Absurdities In The News:

... John Boehner

"Sees ongoing economic uncertainty" (In a speech to the City Club of Cleveland, Boehner said Obama needs to act immediately on several fronts to break what the Republican describes as "ongoing economic uncertainty." ) AP, August 24.
"...called on President Obama Wednesday to fire his economic team." (House Republican leader John Boehner Tuesday called on President Obama to extend the Bush tax cuts, fire his economic team, and listen to the fears and “entrenched uncertainty” that is stalling job growth on Main Street." ) Christian Science Monitor, August 24.
His reasoning for the latter? Apparently it's because the President's economic team sees an unusual level of uncertainty in the economy. In other words, either they stole Boehner's forecast, or he stole theirs!

ALSO:

PepsiCo, maker of carbonated soft drinks and oily-salty potato and corn chips, is launching a marketing campaign to convince people that they sell healthy food (PepsiCo, largely known for junk-food brands such as Doritos and Pepsi, is setting out to triple its sales of healthier products in the next decade.) AP, August 24.

ALSO:

"Vonage Mobile"is a free app that lets you make "free phone calls": (http://apps.facebook.com/vonage-talkfree/). Apparently, if you opt for this, your Smart Phone, your WiFi, and your 3G services will no longer cost you anything. Its all Free!. (But I wouldn't make book on this last claim).

I leave additional examples (of which there is no lack) as an exercise for the reader.
Enjoy!